I have to say, this is in direct response to Aubrey's post.
I didn't just drink the free sample and take the free pen, I put my arm around the soju and embraced her. Aubrey speculated that the giant soju bottle was male. She didn't articulate any specific reasons, though I'm sure there are those who would speculate.
I, however, believe that soju is a woman, for the following reasons:
She makes you feel warm when she comes into your life. Warm and light-headed. She will often cause you to make decisions that your friends do not understand. You laugh and cry more easily, and it often feels like you are walking a few inches or feet above the pavement. Sometimes it bounces quickly between inches and feet.
And yes, she will make you hurt if you are not careful. Do not put too much of yourself into her (or vice versa), or she will leave you suddenly, without warning. Perhaps taking with her your dignity, strength and previous meal.
And so, Aubrey, I contend that soju is female, though definitely not a lady.
Peace,
Rob
p.s. I hardly even noticed the girls in half-skirts that accompanied the soju. Not even hardly at all.
1 comment:
I love that you responded like that to my blog! But I also disagree. Firstly, I did get a picture with the soju bottle (we just have to figure out how to get it off her phone); he made Jen and I give him kisses on his cheeks.
Note the use of "he." Because soju is a he.
(1) The smell is of paint thinner or some sort of industrial strength solvent. It's so primal and manly, like a guy who's out in his garage.
(2) Soju strong arms itself into a relationship, showing up at every meal and in every sort of juice. He's pushy. Not in a whiny sort of way, but rather one that assumes there's already a depth of relationship and he's entitled to you.
(3) All Korean men will put their arms around eachother. But they don't kiss, at least not in public. Our soju bottle demanded kisses from the ladies. Sorry Rob, but soju is definitely male.
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