Dude, this is the best way to cook chicken.
First, you open up a can of beer, and drain half of it. This will fortify you for the next step.
Take that can of beer, and stick it up the chicken's butt. If you need to drink an extra can of beer before this step, feel free to do so.
Wipe him down with olive oil, gently massaging salt and pepper into his skin at the same time. This is also a good time to tuck the neck down inside the body cavity. If it is left sticking out, it will dry out too much for even me to eat.
Set him upright in an oven-safe pan, and cover the bottom of the pan with water (or beer, if any is left). I also like to throw in a few of those cute potatoes and some quartered onions. Carrots too, if you got 'em.
Pop him in the oven at 375 for about 45 minutes to an hour. If you've selected a "companion" for him (as I have in the photo above), it will take another 15 or 20 minutes.
This will make a roasted chicken so moist and tender that you will find yourself fighting with your loved one over the white meat, it's so good. Whenever I ask Horyon how she wants me to cook the chicken, she says, "Beer Can Chicken!" We usually eat our fill in one meal, and I use the rest to make a very delicious soup.